Hello all, and welcome to the weekly blog post!
This week, I’m going over my struggle to cut back on nicotine and caffeine—how it has affected my life, what spurred my decision to make a change, and my goal of quitting completely in the future.
In 2007, at 18 years old, I took my first drag on a cigarette. My unit was training for a deployment to Iraq. I was pulling security at a “checkpoint.” It was snowing, I was cold, and I was regretting my life choices. My buddy pulled out a pack of smokes and lit up. He had been to Iraq before and knew the cheat code for staying sane when life just plain sucked. He offered me a cigarette, and without hesitation, I took a drag. It was a downward spiral from there.
While deployed, I would smoke a pack of Camel Reds daily when conditions allowed. When they didn’t, I would chew a full tin of Copenhagen Straight Long Cut. When I was on base, I’d often do both at the same time. I also guzzled Rip Its, Monsters, and Red Bulls. When we were away from base for extended periods, I drank black coffee. For over a year, I constantly had large amounts of caffeine and nicotine in my system. The only break my body got was when I slept—and even then, I sometimes slept with a chew in.
When I got home, things began to change. I developed painful mouth sores that made it difficult to eat or speak. I had headaches ranging from annoying to debilitating. There were stretches where I couldn’t sleep for days. I knew it was time for a change. I cut my caffeine intake from around 1800 mg a day to 400 mg. I went from smoking a pack a day and chewing a tin a day to smoking a pack a day and only chewing occasionally.
At first, it was excruciating. I was constantly irritated, dealing with caffeine withdrawal headaches, and struggling with insomnia. Food didn’t taste right. In many ways, the same issues were still there—but I noticed them more. On the flip side, I could breathe a little easier, I wasn’t coughing as much, and the mouth sores started to go away. My resting heart rate dropped, and I wasn’t as jittery. For the next four years, I maintained that baseline: a pack of cigarettes a day and 400 mg of caffeine.
In 2013, I met my now wife, who is allergic to cigarette smoke and refused to kiss me if I had a dip in. I was faced with a choice: walk away, or quit smoking and chewing. She never asked me to quit, but I could see where things were headed. That same year, I switched to an e-cigarette. This allowed me to monitor my nicotine intake, sticking to 6 mg juice. The benefits were immediate. My shortness of breath improved, my sense of smell sharpened, food tasted better, and I no longer smelled like an ashtray. I even started working out again, because running didn’t make me feel like I was going to faint. This system worked reasonably well until 2019.
In 2019, my wife began learning about “popcorn lung.” I don’t know all the specifics, but it’s been linked to certain e-cigarette use and can be irreversible—and sometimes fatal. She asked me to stop. On 09/11/2019, I took my last puff from an e-cig. I switched to Zyn 6 mg pouches, and again I noticed improvements. Breathing became easier, my vocal cords weren’t sore, and I didn’t have to worry about keeping devices charged. I kept my caffeine intake at 400 mg.
Since then, nicotine pouches (Zyn and Zone) have been my go-to. Over time, supply chain issues—including COVID and even fires—have made them harder to find in my area. Supply lines are fragile. Given the current global instability, I believe shortages may become more common. Because of that, I decided to cut way back on nicotine with the goal of quitting entirely. Cutting caffeine will be stage two. In my view, caffeine is easier to manage and more accessible, but I do plan to quit that as well.
For the past seven years, I’ve averaged about a tin of Zyn per day—sometimes more, sometimes less, depending on stress. Last week, I decided it was time for a real change. Prices are rising, and I’m tired of being dependent on a chemical. A local store sells 6 mg nicotine lozenges, which can be split in half—unlike Zyn or Zone. Last Friday, I bought a tin and split all 15 lozenges, giving me 30 pieces total. Now, one tin lasts me about two days.
I write the date and time of my first lozenge on the tin to keep myself accountable. It hasn’t been easy. My mouth is healing, and my gums feel like sandpaper. My head feels foggy, and I’m more irritable than usual. I have to stay mindful of that when talking to people. I’ve noticed nervous energy and little habits, like my tongue constantly moving around my mouth. But tomorrow marks one week, and things are already improving.
I’m proud of the work I’ve done so far, and proud of myself for sticking to the goal I set. I’ll update everyone on my progress next week.
In closing: do the hard things. This is one of the most challenging things I’ve ever done, but it’s worth it. Being a Minuteman isn’t about big victories—it’s about personal and community growth. Be proud of the small wins. If you’re unhappy with something in your life and have the ability to change it, step up and do what needs to be done.
Until next week,
You are your own first responder.
—Ian—
